*Do You Like Change?

Most people I know, if the truth be told, do not like change. To change means to do something differently, whether it be by act, deed or principle. Sometimes a change may involve a manner of living, thinking or relating. For example, a person who may feel some anger may need to think before speaking and curtail his/her comments and have to bite their tongue. Other times, change involves a complete shift, whether it be in the form of a job, a place to live, a relationship, and the list goes on and on.

I was listening to my mind as I was driving the other day, exploring my feelings actually, and started thinking about the recent changes in my own life. I have found that, in my own life anyway, the hardest part of any change is making the decision to do so. Once that decision is made, it is like an epiphany and I feel like a hundred pound weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. After that it is easy for me to adapt to the change. As you know, I frequently 'take stock' or do an inventory of myself, and I am totally honest with myself about my way of thinking and acting. For some, this is a task that is prefunctory, and the motions are done, but neither the thinking, nor the behavior changes. This self-evaluation, or inventory taking if you will, can be truly life changing, especially for those who are willing to take an honest look at themselves and take true stock in how they have been acting or behaving.

I truly feel that one can grow by adapting to change. By growing, we are learning that some patterns of thinking or behaving do not work so well for us; we must take the time to think them through and follow a different course. But changing is difficult to say the least, but to stay the same, and not take an honest look at oneself, and learn, can be even more harmful in the long run.

I have learned some valuable life lessons through change. I lived alone in Florida for several years in a beautifully furnished home, had a good job, all of the things that I thought that I wanted, but I was far from happy. One self-reflective night, sitting on my porch, watching a lightening storm, I made the decision to sell the home, move back to Michigan and be with my family. I have never regretted that decision. I was able to be the Grandma I always wanted to be, I was able to establish a bond with my Mother before she died and renewed many friendships that I had left behind. Again, the hardest part of making that change was the decision to do so.

I also made the decision to end a marriage that never really was one. I stewed over that change for quite a while, but once I made the decision, I could not believe how much happier I became. I feel such a strong sense of independence since then. I am happy with the job I do, I love coming home at night and greeting my cats since their love is unconditional, and I love being with 'just me' because through change I have enriched my life many times and I am comfortable being alone with 'just me'.